The Voice Thing

I have a voice, like many of you do. I've always thought it was crap/weird/not fun to listen to, so I kept it to myself. Never being able to hear myself, only what I think I sound like though my skull, I didn't think anyone would want to hear that.

To start off, before last night, I had only had one compliment on my voice, EVER. A really wonderful lady I met at Shambhala last year was talking to me and another person I had gone on a walk with. After conversing for a few minutes she said, "Excuse me, this is really weird but I really, really love how your voice sounds. I've never heard anything like that before." I was so taken aback that the only response I could come up with was, "Oh no, that must be the cigarettes!" Her response was, "No, no, past that, hah, I can hear how wonderful it sounds." I was completely astonished.

A month ago, I tried karaoke for the first time. Being with a group, there seemed to be only one person there that was taking it seriously, enjoying herself more than anyone I'd ever seen jam out live. Country singer superstar in her own backyard =] Truly, she sounded stellar. The two songs I tried, if singing alone, I would have tried to see if I could get the hang of it. I'd never spoken, let alone sang into a microphone before. But, I was not singing alone, thus I wasn't able to really hear myself or see what octaves I should be hitting, etc. Nonetheless, it lit a spark.

I ended up thinking this feeling over for three weeks, and mentioned it to one of my best friends, Keegan (he also helped design my logo, Sick Ego). Instead of looking at me like I was insane or stupid, he just said, "I'll introduce you to some of my musician friends and a singer who plays with them and you guys can talk or sing about it." Literally, less than a week later, enter last night:

Starting out, I was a bit stage-frightish. Alright, let's get use to how this sounds, what's this going to do, oh that was strange, oh no was that flat?! All these things going through my head. Finally I just allowed myself to let go a bit; Probably the wine kicking in ;] It started out with sing-songy stream of conscience comedy hour with Kat. Seeing my friends and some random stranger actually enjoy the random word splatter coming out of my mouth, I got a bit more comfortable. Stream turned into lyrics turned into vocal up and downs. Long notes, low notes, high notes. How high could I go? Really, really fucking high actually, and still sing while doing so. Roughly 2-3 hours of jamming out with my singsonger out. I think I found something. Everything.

It was some of the most fun I've had in Bozeman in a LONG TIME. No, that doesn't mean I don't have fun here all the time, with all of my friends. But never have I felt so center, so something I could do way more of. Since I was 14ish, stage performance, art, dance, etc, have been "careers" I have dreamed of; The dream job. Singer/Vocalist was never on that list, until now. Who knows what the future holds.

Special shout out to Keegan; Amazing person, artist, musician, friend. Seriously amazing individual. Let's fucking rock it again sometime dude =]

Get your goddamn groove on, and I'll see you all next time. 

Happy Frackin' 2015

Good <insert time of day> fellow strange ones,

I can't believe how fast last year went. MADNESS. I am still typing 2014 everywhere and having to make corrections. Blogging.. will become more of a priority in the new year. I am so O.C.D. that I get stuck on the details and have many draft posts started at once. I get in the state that it's not refined or it will take hoursssss to finish and blah blah blah. It needs to change, is what I'm getting at. Come on me, YOU CAN DO IT! (Insert Rob Schneider's voice here).

Today I woke up at 7am so I could get my shit (chores) started. I want to check stuff of a list, It's exhilarating. Eating this early is a challenge for me, but that's another "resolution" of this year that I would like to improve upon. Working in IT and now making blog posts makes me realize how much my spelling has slipped and I rely upon spell check a bit more than I use to. =[ Grammar and reading speed are a resolution as well lolz.

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When last year started, it was looking to turn into the worst year possible. I was in an outrageous situation and had little hope that anything would improve. I was in this funk until August, when my 4th Shambhala was coming up.. Then, I got in the zone. I wanted everything to change once I got back to the states. I was in the middle of moving when I left and had 1/2 my stuff in storage, 1/4 in a new room totally packed up and the last 1/4 at my old place for last week necessities. I had to borrow money and max out credit cards to make my vacation a dream and have two apartments at once in the middle of it all. But it was worth it. Best Shams of my life, and hope that things can only get better from there.

It seems putting myself in this mindstate made the entire experience a bit more... what's the word.. life changing? I've been able to work through reading a lot more books and organizing a lot of my physical shit (you know, ALL THE BOXES?!), and I donated more than any other year in my life. That felt really good, physical pounds I no longer had to carry with me. I'm not going to lie though, I do still have a 10x10 storage unit that's 1/2-3/5ths full. But at least it's all labeled and written down... Someday I'll get renters insurance... Sigh. One step at a time. ;]

This year has started off going rocketship-to-space fast. It's the twelfth!? What? lolz seriously. ;] A topic for another post.

Anyways, those drafts I mentioned in this first paragraph? I plan on posting at least one of them today and getting it finally done =] Not sure which one yet though, I guess that can be a surprise.

See You Space Cowboy..

Blurghity And Books

Who doesn't like books? I have stacks and stacks sitting around my room, requesting my attention. I've been updating shelfari and goodreads over the last year so I can search tags and categories easily, and to make sure I don't read the same book twice by mistake... but when you're dealing with hundreds of books, possibly over a thousand once everything is accounted for, not the easiest task.

When I last moved, I unloaded every box of book I could find from my storage unit and from my parents basement (although I am missing a few boxes still). The idea was I could go through each box and decide if I should keep or downsize my collection. There are books I have from when I was a child. Getting these out gives me the chance to get these over to my brother for his growing family. I love knowing some of my favorite books now have the ability to stay in the family for a while longer.

I spent a lot of today adding to my shelfari, getting dates nearish accurate in date. If anyones on there, hit me up =] I'll eventually get my goodreads up to date, but that process is a bit slower and less visually appealing.

Lately I've been reading a lot of cooking, workout and life efficiency books, but I still make time for good fantasy now and then (see last post lolz). Next year I'd like to continue burning through my physical books that have been stacking up for the last few years >.< There are SO MANY BOOKS! Then Amazon comes along and has a wide ass variety of every genre of book for free or borrow.. or .99 cents which is almost free, or that's the selling point at least. To say the least, I am so far behind =] Not always a bad thing, good reason to lock yourself in a cabin for a few weeks.

I've set aside about five books (three are manga though), to get through before the First. Who knows, maybe time will just take a rest for a while and slow down for a bit. Seriously, it feels like this year went twice as fast as usual. Don't mind me, I'm just bitchin'.

Well, time to make a pesto grilled cheese, and throw on a movie to get ready for the end of my weekend. Ho hum, can't wait for the next week to fly through.. Let's just say I am really, really looking forward to Saturday ;]

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Upcoming posts before the end of the year: 

Cirque Dreams: Holidaze review/ enjoyment post, movies and shows I have enjoyed through this year, some cooking shenanigans... WITH PHOTOS?!, and hopefully at least a few more.

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Have a goodie great week fellow internet geeks.

Five Places I'd Like To Visit...

I was starting this post as a history of where I traveled already in my life.. But through how much time that was taking, I plan on posting that later in the week. In any case, better late and all that jazz... and I love traveling, so don't limit me to this list. ;]

1. Tokyo, Japan :: Hope - Someday
   Going through multiple obsession periods of anime culture, having a crazy tourist adventure in this city has always been a dream. I've been a Fruits of Japan (style) follower for a while, I love seeing what color combinations people are coming up with. It's super inspiring =D
   
2. Paris, France :: Hope - Someday
   Okay, it's not just limited to Paris. I would love to travel across the countryside and see the complex architecture. Wine tasting at vineyards, ride past mansions, and of course shopping, shopping, shopping!! Sidenote, I did take two years of French in High School. Love that language of romance.
   
3. Sydney, Australia :: Hope - Someday sooner rather than later
   The main reason the other first two are marked as just someday is that I'd like to really enjoy the experience, have no time constraint, and have some shopping money when I get there. Sydney has always been one of those places I really want to visit, but also it's pushing close to some of my crazy, crazy bug fears. I am terrified that some of the worlds deadliest creatures all in one beautiful package... Oh and I want to meet the Koalas and pet ALL OF THEM. Places to visit/Things to do:: Surfing (learn to surf before trying this) on one of the most gorgeous beaches in the world, see the Opera House in all it's glory, view the skyline at night with my own eyes, etc, etc..
   
4. New York, New York :: Hope - Someday
   I would love to go to a New York Fashion Week event, any, all of them. It's one of those, in a different life things, In a different life I would have tried to model or actually pursued a fashion design passion adventure. I've enjoyed designing shoes, and hope to further explore them cosplays (learning sewing, crafting, all the ropes). I'd also love to explore the bars and the shops, see the nightlife at it's highest.
   
5. Montreal, Canada :: Hope - Soon
   Who doesn't looooove 18th century architecture in a 21st century city? The Canadian French accents are super fantastic (I love Canada, fave place ever). I'd love to visit the underground city, Notre-Dame Basilica, travel through Old Montreal, Biosphère and the Biodôme. There was a time in my life that I have visited the Botanical Garden, but I don't remember it enough, so that's on the list. Just for the sake of seeing the amazing man made works of art; Parc Jean-Drapeau, St. James United Church, and Mary, Queen of the World Cathedral. Lastly, for the holy shit awesome factor; the Planetarium, and Palais des congrès de Montréal. So so many places.