My Life Has Changed Completely.. (For The Better!!)

Not many of you know me, many none of you. So, let me start by saying, I'm so happy to be alive today. I have found a path, maybe a few, and I feel I am directing myself towards true happiness.

At this moment I have a paused workout on my other screen and had the urge to just get a quick note typed down while I'm rehydrating. It's pretty interesting to see what has changed in the last three months since I started a 16 week IsaBody challenge (Message me if you want to start a healthier life [;  ) And I have to say, I have been making up excuses about my health for a long time. When I first started this I though, ok, this is the one, let's give it my all. And I'm happy to honestly say I have been for the most part! There have of course been highs and lows, but the highs have greatly tipped the scale. Natural endorphins! There's no better thing. Seeing yourself get stronger... There's no real better feeling than that =]

I have about two weeks exactly left till the end of my challenge, and I plan to make the most out of every single day of it! NO MORE EXCUSES! Anyone reading this who is waiting for a wake up call, seriously man, this is it. Today really is the day. DO IT. You will thank yourself for it.

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And here I am again after finishing my workout and having my amazing little shake friend, YUM! Super pumped, so much to get done tonight! I feel like my life has been on the fast track for the last three months and it has no plan on slowing down! Super exciting, I can't wait to see what happens! 

I have been completely focusing on my health, both physical and mental, lately. Strength is the goal, Life is the reason. I want to experience it all, I don't want any physical limitations to hold me back. I want to have the ability to focus on any goal and get it done. First and foremost, physical strength. Second, mental willpower. (These kind of go hand in hand though so possible tie for first..) Third, my vocal abilities, beat mastery (dancing included in that statement) and songwriting skills. (News to you!?). This has become so important to me. Fourth, Of course overall mental fucking kickass-ness. I have lots of computron books to read, so little time. Love the Linux. 

Coffee coffee, I need more coffee and a bit of a shower. Time to head off. I should post more, so many drafts. Do you people like cooking? What kinda things? =] 

Parting note:: I just realized I had two new Google+ friends from my town, Hello friends! 

See you on the dark side..

The Voice Thing

I have a voice, like many of you do. I've always thought it was crap/weird/not fun to listen to, so I kept it to myself. Never being able to hear myself, only what I think I sound like though my skull, I didn't think anyone would want to hear that.

To start off, before last night, I had only had one compliment on my voice, EVER. A really wonderful lady I met at Shambhala last year was talking to me and another person I had gone on a walk with. After conversing for a few minutes she said, "Excuse me, this is really weird but I really, really love how your voice sounds. I've never heard anything like that before." I was so taken aback that the only response I could come up with was, "Oh no, that must be the cigarettes!" Her response was, "No, no, past that, hah, I can hear how wonderful it sounds." I was completely astonished.

A month ago, I tried karaoke for the first time. Being with a group, there seemed to be only one person there that was taking it seriously, enjoying herself more than anyone I'd ever seen jam out live. Country singer superstar in her own backyard =] Truly, she sounded stellar. The two songs I tried, if singing alone, I would have tried to see if I could get the hang of it. I'd never spoken, let alone sang into a microphone before. But, I was not singing alone, thus I wasn't able to really hear myself or see what octaves I should be hitting, etc. Nonetheless, it lit a spark.

I ended up thinking this feeling over for three weeks, and mentioned it to one of my best friends, Keegan (he also helped design my logo, Sick Ego). Instead of looking at me like I was insane or stupid, he just said, "I'll introduce you to some of my musician friends and a singer who plays with them and you guys can talk or sing about it." Literally, less than a week later, enter last night:

Starting out, I was a bit stage-frightish. Alright, let's get use to how this sounds, what's this going to do, oh that was strange, oh no was that flat?! All these things going through my head. Finally I just allowed myself to let go a bit; Probably the wine kicking in ;] It started out with sing-songy stream of conscience comedy hour with Kat. Seeing my friends and some random stranger actually enjoy the random word splatter coming out of my mouth, I got a bit more comfortable. Stream turned into lyrics turned into vocal up and downs. Long notes, low notes, high notes. How high could I go? Really, really fucking high actually, and still sing while doing so. Roughly 2-3 hours of jamming out with my singsonger out. I think I found something. Everything.

It was some of the most fun I've had in Bozeman in a LONG TIME. No, that doesn't mean I don't have fun here all the time, with all of my friends. But never have I felt so center, so something I could do way more of. Since I was 14ish, stage performance, art, dance, etc, have been "careers" I have dreamed of; The dream job. Singer/Vocalist was never on that list, until now. Who knows what the future holds.

Special shout out to Keegan; Amazing person, artist, musician, friend. Seriously amazing individual. Let's fucking rock it again sometime dude =]

Get your goddamn groove on, and I'll see you all next time.